Barnmouse Blitherings


Of Ginger Marinated Hamster Toes and Brown Sugar Glazed Buffalo Boogers
February 19, 2007, 5:02 pm
Filed under: Public Humiliation, whineyness

I don’t know if y’all remember, but back then, I was way too excited that we were getting a Trader Joes.

Yeeeeaaaaah.

Apparently, it was really nothing to get excited over.

They took what used to be a Winn Dixie and turned it into a Trader Joe’s AND a Staples. And believe me when I tell you that most of that space went to Staples.

This place is cramped and filled with way too many overly excited, very rude people who push you with their carts. This place isn’t even big enough for people to walk around with baskets, much less carts! Maybe it’s calmed down a little bit there since I went, but I don’t see this place every getting “un-crazy” enough for me to go back there. Unless of course I’m in the market for some of the strange ass shit they have there. Hey, try our lastest find! Guatemalan Chocolate Covered Monkey Farts! They’re what every dish needs! And great for midnight snacking!

The only things I would ever go back there for are carob (for the dog treats) or this huge bottle of vanilla extract that I saw there for a pretty good price for my homemade marshmallows*. That’s pretty much it.

And OMG – apparently, if you buy one of their “special items” of the day…the cashier rings this huge bell thing SO loud (and with no warning) and then hollers something out, but I was too busy screaming and running for the door to hear what it was! I’m sorry, but for skiddish, twitchy people like me, the loud bell and the yelling? Yeah, not a good combination.

When I finally made my way out of there, the outside had never felt so good. I think you could actually cut the anxiety in there with a knife. And the people? OMG The rude people! I could have gone my whole life without being rammed in the butt with a shopping cart. Yeah. That was interesting.

*stepping down off soapbox*

I’ll be back later with a dog treat update.

*and the homemade marshmallows? Dee-Li-Shus!

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