Barnmouse Blitherings

June 8, 2007, 1:31 am
Filed under: general wonderment, it was all his fault, Public Humiliation

Yesterday, I had to inform my husband, the computer genious, the car fixer-upper, the reader and understander of technical manuals, what the slang phrase “Muffin Top” means. He thought it meant (oh God) a girl with a small rack. Like about the size of actual muffin tops. I am not yet over the shame.

Anyway, over the course of me explaining, my brain (which works in mysterious ways) came up with a new slang term. So, you know how when you see a girl with pants on that are 2 sizes too small and a belly shirt, it’s called “muffin top”….but what about when you see a guy with that gut hanging over his belt buckle? This is where my new phrase comes into play!

Girl with gut = Muffin Top

Guy with gut = Cupcake Top

*pause for inevitable laughter*

See…and here’s how I came up with that…when a girl has a muffin top, it’s pretty uniform, right? Like, on both sides and in the front (can I believe I’m talking about this? Um, actually, yeah! I can.), and when I bake muffins, they generally come out pretty uniform too. On the other hand, when I bake cupcakes, they always come out lopsided! Like a guy’s gut! You know how you see a man from behind and they look totally normal and maybe even a little bit in shape and then they turn around and there it is! Six months pregnant!

So who’s with me? Let’s put “cupcake top” on the map! LOL

And also, I feel compelled to inform y’all that earlier, I ate a piece of Quaker granola bar off the floor. To my credit, I had only dropped it about a second earlier and I did blow on it. What? You know germs jump off at the first sign of a breeze. Oh you didn’t? It’s totally true. Really. It is. Stop looking at me that way.

Oh whatever.

I’m off to go sit in the freezer. It’s damn hot in here.


1 Comment so far
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That is some hilarious shit!!! A cupcake top…I see that a LOT!!!

Comment by Arlene

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